Despite the overwhelming presence on social media and the prevalence of articles extolling the virtues of this chain chicken restaurant, I am not a patron. Sorry Nando’s, this isn’t anything personal. There just isn’t one of your restaurants anywhere near me and I refuse to travel miles just for food.

I have been once or twice; in fact, the last time I went was with my older brother and two people have never failed so hard at ordering food since I accidentally ordered a group bread and olive platter on a first date, only to find out that she was gluten intolerant. I ate the whole thing myself because I will not waste good food.  God, I was so bloated I think I just spent the rest of the day laying down and taking really shallow breaths.

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